Living fast and dying young

The past catches up to you in odd ways and at odd times. It's always when you least expect it. Things you thought were long gone, deep and buried, resurface just to destroy you all over again with the memory of what you once had.

It's never a good idea to look back, in fact it's something I religiously avoid if I can help it. It becomes painful to know that something you had long ago was the high point of your life so far, but it's so far gone and can never be retrieved. Cut to the present day - an empty shell of a life. It looks good from the outisde, things always do, who can dispute the life of a party animal. New experiences, new people, new life filled with adventures. Alcohol, drugs, partying and knowing everyone you need to know for the purposes of living it to the full.

Knowing everyone but having no close friends, sleeping with people but having no connection to any of them. An empty life, devoid of human contact but full of shallow pleasures. These get you only so far, before the lack of anything real, anything to hold and call your own, becomes an overwhelming loneliness.

A sharp comparison is made between the life you had and the life you live, one filled with true happiness you felt could never die, one filled with happiness that lasts as long as the cocaine high.